Flattery in a teacher evaluation leads to Ross dating one of his students (Elizabeth). He finds out he could get fired, but the forbidden nature of the relationship makes Elizabeth want it even more. An old friend of Chandler's (Dana) is Directing an Al Pacino movie, and Joey asks Chandler to get him an audition. Monica is jealous of the time Chandler spends with Dana. A fire in Phoebe and Rachel's apartment means they'll have to stay with their friends for a few weeks--one at Monica's and one at Joey's. At first Monica's apartment seems to be the accomodation of choice, but it soon becomes clear that Joey's is the place to be.
Joey: Oh, well think of it like this, when you're 90...
Ross: I know, when I'm 90 she'll be like 80 and it won't seem like such a big difference.
Joey: No, that's not what I was going to say at all. No, what I was going to say is when you're 90 you'll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old.
Joey: Now listen, the last day of auditions is Thursday, okay? So I gotta get in there by Thursday. Okay?
Just remember Thursday. Thursday! Can you remember Thursday?
Chandler: Yeah. So Tuesday?
Joey: Thursday! Look, if you need help remembering, just think of it like this: The third day. All right? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when? Huh? What day? Thursday! The third day! Okay?
Phoebe: Oh, it's bad. It's really bad. The only thing in there that isn't burned is an ax. Which I do not remember buying!
Monica: All right, well, why don't I go out with an ex-boyfriend and do Joey a favor?
Joey: Hey, you wanna do Joey a favor, maybe you go out with Joey.
Elizabeth: Oh please! It was such a big class! You never even noticed me!
Ross: What? Of course I did! You, uh... you sat next to Sleepy Sleeperson.
Ross: Oh, uh, I had trouble remembering everyone's name, so I... I kinda came up with nicknames. Like the guy on the other side of you was Smelly Von Brownshirt.
Ross:It is frowned upon. Especially by that professor we ran into last night, Judgey Von Holier-than-thou.
Monica: Well, Ross, you be careful now. You don't want to get a reputation as, you know, Professor McNails-his-students.